I believe that children are the future~  Show them my blog and let them lead the way~

The scariest thing about my life is the way that I’ve managed to influence the young people to walk, talk and act just like me.  Can you imagine legions of high school students aspiring to be  drunken, broke-ass, scheming, lying losers?  Well, maybe they would end up that way with or without me.  The odd thing is that those young people who follow in my footsteps are enjoying unprecedented success and glory.  What the hell?!  Where is all of my glory?  I want glory!  I’ll settle for a young woman from Hong Kong named Gloria.  On second thought . . . fuck glory.  I want the Hong Kong woman immediately!  Make it happen!

Speaking of children . . . did you hear or read about those girls in Massachusetts who made some kind of “pregnancy pact”?  Shiver me timbers!  Is this what kids are doing now for a rush?  Whatever happened to normal, healthy activities like doing drugs and jumping off of roofs?  My world has been rocked!  I thought pregnancy was the punishment.  It’s the albatross that haunts men and women in dreams.  Albatross?  Really??  I’m calling pregnancy an albatross.  I’m gonna stick with it.

I’m not into those teenage girls.  They’re sneering, ditzy mush-heads.  That’s my opinion.  Alright, that’s what I tell myself every single day to prevent a long prison sentence.  Ahhh, but I have an Asian fetish and a lot of Asian girls look a lot younger than their actual age~  Jaaaaaakkkkeee~~~~  Isn’t that the whole purpose?  You dirty old man!  No.  That’s not it at all.  I live in New Mexico.  There are 5 Asian people in the entire state.  And one of them is Antoinette Antonio and she’s off the market.  Or is she?

Moving on.  Let’s change the subject.  I’m not really into the trends.  I don’t know what’s going on.  Some fake ass gangsters/rappers threw out some terms and phrases that I didn’t understand at all.  I should look up that word and post it for everyone.  Someone has to know the definition.  I’ll be right back . . .

I found it.  Trappers?  What the fuck is a trapper?  Isn’t it some kind of hunter or woodsman?  Are the kids using this as street slang now or did I come across a group of social retards?

Listen up all y’all trappers with yo’ peeps in yo’ hoods.  I be reppin’ the 5-0-5 with my Glock and my Hennessy, pimpin’ dem ho’s and blasting fools who step to me.  Ohhhh!!!!  A “trapper” is a drug dealer?  hahaha!!  That’s sooooo stupid!

Alright all you little trappers out there –  Practice safe sex.  We have plenty of trappers roaming the good earth right now.

I need to address one last issue before I go to bed.  This is in regards to women who have a full bush.  I’m a big fan of the bush.  Shaving is fine, don’t get me wrong.  Designs, trimming, bald, stubby … whatever.  I love pussy.  If a full bush is the “in” thing or the “hip” thing (note the quotation marks . . . I feel so old right now for not knowing about this trapper bullshit) then I am in heaven!  I love a hirsute woman!  I remember being at the Getty Museum and I was looking at some great photography.  Some guy took a picture of a woman and I could see hair in her armpit.  Mmmmm!!!  I love it!  Hairy arms, hairy legs, full bush . . . maybe not so much facial hair.  I don’t know exactly what a Bearded Woman is . . . is it really a woman with a full beard?  I can’t think about it before I go to sleep.  I’ll find out the next time the circus is in town.  And that’s the other thing!  There is no such thing as a circus anymore!  Animals are mistreated and that’s wrong.  Freaks can get better jobs these days.  Fuck the circus.  Maybe I should just put an ad out on craigslist.

Alright, kiddos.  I had fun writing this.  Good Night!

Original post by causticj36